Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
