then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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