I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Randomize
