i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
