grandma shit on top of the toilet
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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