I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
