His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
