He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
