So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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