I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
