If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Randomize
