Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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