We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Randomize
