Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
