I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
