She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
