i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
