omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
