So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I see more hoeing in ur future
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