i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
