I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
