I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Green mimosas i think yes
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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