Do you still have your period?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
