I got chris browned last night
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
