She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
