he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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