Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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