I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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