You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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