C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
