Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
