i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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