i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I touched a dick in church today
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
