everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
