kristin has been a bad kristin
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
