Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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