I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
