Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
