is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize