How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
