hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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