his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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