Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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