It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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