Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
