That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
