Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
