thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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