You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize
