She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
